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November 1985

 

screaming through a world

careening on and off

uncertainty

too familiar a friend

 

so much potential

wasted

 

so much life

gone

 

the winds all howl and burn

blowing who knows where

still leaving where I am

 

sunlit portals some without

could all roads lead to Rome?

or heaven even

 

virtues taken

choices made

black cloud blue sky

rainy day or what

 

there

but for the grace of God

go I

 

or

 

but for the Devil

I could be there

 

hindsight blinding foresight

shadow voices passing wisdom

       unheard

ghost like in the roar

tossed aside

so casually by the wind

 

alone

I tremble

I cringe

at the edge of abyss

dare I take flight

and even so

could these wings soar

against that roaring wind

 

the wrack of other things

 

I know not what

they were

 

clutter at my troubled heart

 

these ruins

what of them

did they wait too long

or take the leap too soon

 

but what!

who cares

I am me and I still live

and while these limbs

possessed of life are mine

I fight

I dream

 

of what

or when

or how or who

and I

 

towering castles fortress solid

blown away as smoke in fall

that stormy autumn blast

 

no holds barred

it lives

 

replaced by others equally bold

to the task at hand

equally mute

before the force without

 

before my feet abyss gives way

too soon I must take my dive

following those to whom belonged

these bones now dead as dust

shall I prove equal

or come up less than whole

 

sudden gale

a cyclone plays my hand

blowing where it cares

this will now made of straw

dust before the wind

still blows

 

where is the sun

that once I loved

 

dares it shine

where night is hailed utmost

 

where will it end?

 

a small and naked man

humbled to his core

 

or

 

a bitter callous shell

proud to quell the storm

 

the eye draws near

but will I prove unworthy

or prove that I am still quite strong

 

tumults clash

within without

the leap draws nearer

will I be bird

or dust?

 


Screaming Through a World

A poem by Peter Rhebergen

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