October 19, 2021

I don't know if I'm dying or if I've died

all I know is a part of me that was alive

it doesn't seem to be alive anymore

whether that’s me dying or just a part

it’s hard to tell, it was so much of me

joy fleets, is that what death feels like?

then it feels like all of me has died, is dead

but I still breathe, still smile (on occasion)

still weep (on more than one occasion)

I still try to make alive what has died

but it wasn't me that killed it and it’s hard

it isn’t me that keeps it dead and it’s hard

my chances of success seem rather slim

to return to life what others have ended